Forever

I need to keep up with this blogging! Things have been stressful to say the least but I'm trying to stay positive and find things to keep the kids busy on these rainy days. Big update coming soon on life with twins! Got a meeting with Becky out twin mom leader/coach tomorrow so looking forward too it! And my dad surprised Nick and I with a vacation for 5 days kid free! Thanks again dad I sooo need this!

Lost

I'm really struggling with finding out who I am besides a mom and wife and maid...I always wanted to be a wife and stay at home mom but now I don't know it's so hard and I need strength and I don't have it right now. Between the anxiety and depression I feel so lost and disconnected! Even of no one reads this it helps to say it out loud even if only through writing!

The Start

Our twin mom leader and life coach Becky asked us (all the ladies in the twin mom group I am in) to write our story. Like a lot of the other moms I dont think there's much of a story to write. Obviously to me it is important, it was the birth of my babies. I am guessing its not much different then most birth stories, other than its mine. I was going to say unlike but I know thats not true, there are other writers in the group. I love writing but havent written much since highschool, I am hoping this will be the start of my inspiration to start writing again. So I am going to take Becky's advice and opportunity to turn my story into something hopefully inspiring for someone else or just help someone else know that they arent alone in this struggle with twins. Not just twins, but having other kids as well, and being a wife and find our places as our own person. So, this is just the beginning of my writing and I am going to try with everything I have to write a little everyday or at least every other day BECAUSE ITS SOMETHING FOR ME! Although right now as we speak or write in my case, my 3 energenic children are running around their room tormenting eachother. I hope that I can look back at this moment and realize how close this made them. I hope they will be close in the future when they become adults and have something I never did, a relationship with my siblings.

Being a twin mom

The other day I had another twin mom ask me for advice on how to handle...well everything. It took me days to write her back because I dont want to make it worse for her but I dont want to lie to her either. So I told her the truth, her twins are one and mine are 3 1/2, and I told her it doesnt get any easier, it only gets harder. I struggle everyday with being a mom a wife and trying to just figure out who I am and what I am supposed to be doing. Am I good enough? Am I doing enough? Who am I? What can I do to help my children grow up to be kind, smart, and find their dreams? What are my dreams, where is life going? Im 27 now and I still havent figured out life, let alone how to manage 3 year old twins and 5 year old, plus a marriage....She just really got me to thinking....who am I and what can I and how do I find myself so I can make my marriage better and help my children to grow to be wonderful people....

Tonights Dinner Recipe

In crockpot on low- 5 Chicken breasts cooked in some chicken broth seasonings-white chicken chili, cumin, taco seasoning, cajun seasoning, and free cilantro. After chicken has cooked for about 3 -4 hours, start cutting/shredding, add a bag of frozen corn, two cans of white beans, a can of rotel diced tomatoes, and some shredded cheese. Cook for another 3 or so hours on low. Garnish with shredded cheese, sour cream and totilla chips=) Easy and goood!

5 Year Old Boys

Apparently turning 5 makes you tough. Here's the story...Both boys ended up in bed with me this morning, just like every morning after dad leaves for work. Then I heard them creap out and though oh boy I should get up soon and no sooner than that and Chase comes in saying brother hit me. We talked and cuddled a bit then we got up and came out to talk to brother and I noticed Chase's head was bleeding (not a lot just a tiny spot) and I look at Chase then I look at Brayden and Im thinking...Your brother hit you and made you bleed...? (Brayden I love you so much your my baby boy which is probably why you have been so whimpy the last 5 years!) Moral of the story...Big brother is finally sticking up for himself, which could be good or bad?!

Keeping up..

Here I am trying to keep up with my blogging but really who wants to hear about my life? Well your going to anyways;) Trying to potty train 2-2 year olds is nuts...trying to get twins to go to bed at night is even worse..It takes them an hour of talking before they finally fall asleep. I am so excited for Thanksgiving I actually get to have it at my house this year...Sad that my hubby wont be home for it though. Got my Christmas decorations up...=)